This review was submitted by Mark.
One of the rare fable books I recommend, this book has the power to change your life. I’m not kidding.
My good friend Michael Swenson recommended this book to me, and I will be forever grateful*. It’s the story of a manager/executive newly hired by a company with a powerful culture and training process, one that seeks to get deeply into how each member thinks and feels and works with each other.
The reason Michael recommended it is because at first blush it appears to directly contradict Manager Tools’ philosophy of focusing on behavior. [To be clear, we focus on behavior because it’s observable, measurable and teachable as the engine of success. We know that love and service to others is the engine. – H] When I read it the first time, I said, yeah, okay, good points…but try to teach that to others. THAT is HARD. To their credit, that’s what the Arbinger Institute is doing. Full disclosure, it’s quite direct that behavior is NOT the answer…and I still highly recommend this book. Imagine that.
The book posits that we are all terribly self-deluded, deceiving ourselves about why others are the way they are, and, frankly, why we behave the way we do. It suggests that we have to change the way we think about others to begin to get the best out of ourselves and of others. It’s an internal change they recommend.
I can vouch for its accuracy. I have seen in myself many of the failings highlighted in the book. I tend to see my behavior as the teachable way to get there, but I won’t argue with a book this powerful. I just think we can all behave our way into believing.
This book is good enough to be read twice. I’ve done it. And I never do that except with Peter Drucker and Travis McGee.
* - But never so much as I am for Michael’s patient friendship. We argue routinely over who has gotten the most from the other. Since I have the bigger platform to say thank you, for now I am winning. Thanks dude.