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Submitted by sbockh01 on


I am sure that this is a common scenario; I have just been promoted to run the group that I am currently a member of. It is an awkward situation where I have a relationship with my coworkers as peers, (which helps) but I don't want this to interfere with the new role. Are there any suggestions, articles, or books to help me through this transition for coworker to manager.



RichRuh's picture
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Congrats on your promotion!

Have you seen this page yet: ?
These podcasts are essential listening.

Many forum members have recommended [u]The First 90 Days[/u] by Michael Watkins.

You should also do some searches through the forums. There are lots of other good answers here.


jhack's picture

One more thought: Your relationship with your ex-peers is going to change. No way around it. You're now the boss. You can still be friendly, congenial, etc. But you are also responsible for providing them feedback, coaching them, etc. You can do that without putting on airs.

But you can't behave towards them the same way as before, and succeed.


kevdude's picture

What I have done: Start gently. But as jhack says, your relationships will change, for good or "bad" - fraternizing dynamics is a big part of that - you may find yourself becoming a bit more distant, in fact it may be necessary. There may also be times when you are resented - hold your ground, be firm, fair and friendly. Before you know it, the respect will build, if it is not already there, and you'll be soaring.

agrandy's picture
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(1) One on One's
(2) Feedback
(3) Coaching

Then, the staff meeting casts.

To start, I recommend AGAINST other articles or books. It diffuses focus on the above.

Good luck!


Mark's picture
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[b]Welcome to they.[/b]

You're getting good advice here.

A bit more:

You don't need to "act like" the boss. They know you are. Neither act like it, NOR IGNORE IT. It is who you are now at work. You are no longer who you were.

Don't raise your voice.

Don't be bullied. Just walk away.

You don't have to have all the answers.

You SURELY don't have to have all the answers right NOW.

Smile more. Unsmiling bosses scare people.





agreen's picture

Go with Mark's suggestion - trinity, trinity, trinty. I have been in management roles for 10 years, and in the last 6 months discovered MT. Revisiting the 'trinity' basics and implementing them has changed the way I work, improved the enjoyment I am getting out of the job and most imortantly the enjoyment of the team. I got some great feedback from team members just today talking about how they had noticed things had changed, but they just couldn't work out why! This is the best stuff you will come across for management.

Focus on the basics and you will never look back.

Then, as agrandy says, look at the the staff meeting podcasts and feel you way from there.

vinnie2k's picture

I would argue that your situation [b]requires [/b] a MT approach because you won't be able to boss your employees around! Managers might get away with bossing employees around when they come in as the Boss, but in your case, it just won't work.

I have been in that situation twice, and I kinda looked at it like managing older/more experienced people: a bit more participative management & listening; ease your way in with a few good decisions that establish your role.

terrih's picture

Congrats! I was in the same boat last February.

What Mark said, for sure.

Don't be afraid to admit you're just learning this management stuff; and apply the Manager Tools you learn without hesitation. Practice.

(boy if I could go back in time & tell myself this! :lol: )

WillDuke's picture
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Mark mentioned the Trinity. If you're new to MT, you might not know that the trinity is:

[b]One-on-One[/b] meetings with your staff. 30 minutes once a week. Every week.
[b]Feedback[/b]. Constant feedback, mostly affirmative, sometimes adjusting.
[b]Coaching[/b]. Help your people develop.

Those are very brief and inadequate descriptions. Mark and Mike have spent a lot of time and effort making some amazing information available in their podcasts. Go listen to the One-on-One podcast first. (We call it the O3). Implement that.
Then, Feedback. That's a podcast too.
Then Coaching. That's a 3rd podcast.

Then, just keep listening. Cherry pick what looks helpful. I'd probably suggest the DISC model podcasts next. They are members only podcasts, but membership is free. :)

You can sign up for premium content, it's only $15/mo. That content is show notes and stuff to support the podcasts. It's not necessary, but it can speed up your learning curve.

Then, IMPLEMENT. Don't just listen, roll with it!

Oh, and congrats on your new job. :)

regas14's picture
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A great addition to the trinity in starting something new is the podcast on Jumpstarting Internal Customer Relationships.

It's always good to know what your customers want before you go off half-cocked in the wrong direction.