I'm a first line software development manager in a very large high tech company and I'm appealing to everyone for help in learning how to deal with something that has been bothering me more and more in my career as I work up the ladder. I guess this isn't really a question about management or leadership, but I'm hoping I can get some practical advice from all the other great leaders on these forums and of course Mark and Mike themselves.
My working environment is extremely competitive as is most of high tech these days and I would consider myself a "go-getter" and a very competitive person. What has bothered me a lot in the past is when other competitive go-getters do things that affect me in order to get more visibility for themselves. As an example, I was assigned the development owner of a particular maintenance release and I found out that a peer manager, who obviously knew I was the owner, put together a presentation about the release and gave it to a group of managers in a different area and did not inform me she was doing this. To me, it was a clear attempt on her part to get visibility when that opportunity should have came to me first. Now, the competitiveness in me makes my blood boil when things like this happen, to the point where confronting the person about it is very difficult as it would probably come out all wrong.
Another thing I struggle with is the flip side of the example above - when I do something that someone else feels is "stepping on their toes" or not giving them due credit and they then get their blood boiling over it. I'm always, or at least I think I am, conscious of not stepping on other peoples toes as I know what it feels like, but in some cases I still end up by having peers give me "attitude" out of nowhere to later find out that I didn't include their name on an email that went out to a large group of senior managers and influential people.
At times it makes me want to just throw the white towel in and say to heck with it all.
Can anyone offer me any practical tips or advice with how to deal with this?
Thanks in advance.