My wife was an admin for the president of a very large company. For the last few years she worked for him when he was CFO. They were a great team. He gave her high ratings every year and took her with him when he became president. She was thrilled to have the opportunity to support a president...especially HER PRESIDENT. I mean she had a relationship with this guy.

Today, he gave her a package but didn't even have the stones to do it himself. His HR person told my wife he wanted someone who had experience supporting a president. All this feedback, no warnings....nothing. Bad management at it's finest.

This sucks! You know, if this happened to me, I'd be better prepared for it and more positive. I guess that I just feel protective over her and angry over the way she was treated by someone who she trusted. I love her so much and hate to see her in this kind of pain. I hate that she feels this betrayed.

If there is anyone in the Princeton, NJ area looking for a GREAT admin....

LouFlorence's picture
Training Badge


Very sorry to hear this for your wife and you. It must be a real shot to the ego, especially with no warning. And on Friday. What a stinky way to start the weekend.

Go do something fun & not completely responsible.


jhack's picture


This is why family comes first - because you'll be there for her when she needs you.

Take care...


WillDuke's picture
Training Badge

Wow, what a horrible story.

I know this is a dangerous analogy, but I'd offer up a point of view here. Some men get married to a smart beautiful woman who helps them with their career and family lives. 20 or 30 years later they they become short-sighted and divorce their now "old" wife for a trophy wife. The trophy wife is very pretty and very good at utilizing the resources the man has built up over the years. End result? Anchor.

Why do people want to trade in their helpful mate for an anchor?

I can only assume that your wife was an important part of this person's success. Why would he forget that? That's just short-sighted.

refbruce's picture

There are probably a number of people around here who've been let go. I am one of them. Obviously, I don't know your wife or what specifically will help. But my general observation is that there are lots of people who recover from these kinds of events and do even better. I do suggest that you continue to do what you're doing -- remind her that she is capable and that her ex-boss was an idiot.

Fortunately for me, I am neither in need of an admin (I have a great one) nor in NJ :-).

For my own experience (8 years ago, now), there are still some emotional scars and some days that I doubt myself. Intellectually, I know it was mostly a matter of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. All of those are normal.

Mark's picture
Admin Role Badge

Sorry this happened to your spouse. It's unfortunate that unprofessional, poor managerial behaviors exist at all levels of all organizations.

I would encourage her, in spite of the poor ending, to ask if her former boss would be willing to give a reference, and make sure it's an unreservedly strong one. Those help at the level she's capable of performing at.


AManagerTool's picture

We sincerely appreciate the outpouring of support from you all. Both my wife and myself are much more under control now. I really have to hand it to her. She got right back up and has interviews lined up for this week. Not only that, she is thinking of not even bothering to go back to work and finally starting up her wedding planning business. She has been talking about it for years. I am actually excited for her.

Thanks again,

WillDuke's picture
Training Badge

Good for her! Aren't silver linings great? You know, she might have been underpaid too! She might get a raise if she goes back to work for someone else. If she does her own thing, well, just ask M&M it ain't all about money, personal satisfaction is priceless. :)

karaikudy's picture
Training Badge

Very tragic state of management.

As you had mentioned, may be new opportunities like wedding planning to open up and things will turnout well.

This reminds me of my personal experience in Pakistan, when my previous company was downsized there about 5 years back, couple of my very very close friends(colleagues) were asked to go. They took in their stride and had the courage to start their own venture. (independently)

When I met them during my next visit 6 months later, ( I used to go to Pakistan at least 2 times a year) I made a point to meet them over dinner and they were very happy that the change had indeed happened and each one is doing far far better. They also wondered why god didn't make this happen earlier.!!!.

As the saying goes here (May be everywhere) Some times when one door closes, more than 3 opens, we are too dumbstruck by the one that closed, we fail to see the opened doors.

I am sure things would turn out well.

Good luck