Submitted by angelicdoctor on
Just a bit of a rant here. I just came off vacation yesterday and didn't get half a day in before my millennial High D boss dressed me down for failing to do my direct's job. I gotta tell ya, this management thing is not at all what I envisioned it to be. Now, on to re-listening to that 'angry boss' podcast...
It wasn't all bad...I mean, after he was done laying into me, he did wish me a happy new year...
Welcome back Stress - Idea for a new PodCast ?
Perhaps this can be an idea for a new MT Podcast.
They have one for preparing for vacation -- but they could use one for Coming Back.
I am sorry that your Boss does not seem to be very self-aware, and is acting in a way that difficult for you to deal with.
Let's hope he improves with time.
I hope that you can take a moment and reflect on this as a communication style difference.
If your Boss is a High D and your are a High S (I suspect) .....
He will be feeling the stress of returning to a pile of work that has not been done and immediately want to take strong decisive action to get on top of it all.
Feelings and Team cohesion are on the bottom of that priority list for him.
-- He was most likely spouting our from his stress
A High S would generally wish to come back and reconnect with the Team. Ease back into the work.
Take a look at the ToDo list - assess the priorities over the course of the first day.
And then start warming up the Tasking Engine.
Nobody likes to feel pushed and rushed.
It makes sense to me that a High S would feel pushed around and rushed and brushed aside in this kind of situation.
And -- Both approaches have some advantages.
I would recommend that you take some time to reframe the whole interaction.
You know that your Boss is a High D.
I am not saying that he is not so High D that he is (or is not) out of balance and unhealthy --- but, we should not lose site of the fact that it is probably not a personal attack.
Good Luck to You
Thanks, TJ. That is a pretty good and brief summary of the situation. This, coupled with your suggestion provides a framework upon which I can build. In the mean time, the hits keep coming. More complaints about how my entire team appears to be failing this morning... Ugh.
That was nicely framed TJPuccio!
I would add... Yes! It is entirely possible that management is not what you expected. It is a different feeling when you are held accountable for the work of your team members. It can be hard if you hold yourself to a different standard than they hold for themselves.
Make sure the team understands what the priorities are and that accountability continues to flow downhill. That doesn't mean you need to handle it the same way as your High D boss.
All of the above advice is great. I have a similar situation, and these tips are helpful.
What have you done to prepare your team to perform when you’re out of office?
Just keep learning and don't lose hope. While I'm a huge believer in DISC, it also behooves you to directly pay attention to the way your boss wants you to communicate with him, work, and what he holds you accountable for. We all have tendencies that run the gambit of DISC and figuring out where your boss lands in a particular area takes direct observation and a bit of trial and error :).
For example, I have a high S boss (I'm also a high S) who doesn't want employee names in the weekly report. When I asked why, he said he wants to be able to cut and paste pieces of my report and include them in his weekly to the VP who, at his level, wants it to be more impersonnal (maybe a high C or High D, they all look like High D's from way down here). I hadn't considered this and thus tweaked my reporting to accomodate.
Look closely as to why you got the feedback, synthesize it, and understand how to correct it in the future. Perfection is a journey, not a destination.
Happy new year!
All the best,