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I’m an account graduate, not that fat to fit in any company. But there is one undeniable truth about me: I’m not good looking and suffer from a major inferiority complex whenever I go for an interview. Even if I manage to find a job in some BIG organization, I still would always feel left out and unconfident. I’m searching for some nice job but am very conscious about my appearance. Any solution?

juliahhavener's picture

Your best bet, from someone who's been there and had close friends there, is to either look in the mirror, make friends, and get over it; find a way to make a change until you can; or fake it.

I promise you that how you feel about you makes a much larger impact than anything else - I'm not going to pay much attention to how you look, but I will pay attention to how you act. Show me what's important to you and THAT is where my eyes will be. As an employer, I don't care what you look like, can you do my job? Can you do it well? Are you enthusiastic about it? Are you ready and willing to learn new skills?

I could give a lot of examples, but at the core is what's above.

jhack's picture

Julia's spot on: people react to how comfortable you are with yourself.

The director had leg models stand in for Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman" for the closeups of her legs. My gosh, if Julia Roberts isn't pretty enough...

It's tough. Our media culture sets impossible standards. Almost everyone wishes they were prettier/smarter/taller/faster/better. As we mature, we get more comfortable with who we are, and we change what we can.

Good companies want you to be clean, well groomed, and dressed professionally. You can do that. They want you to be skilled and energetic. You can do that. If you get the interview casts (YOU SHOULD DO THIS!) and you prepare for the interviews the way M&M recommend, you will gain the confidence you seek.

Good luck.

John

lindseym1979's picture

Ohmigosh! This is ridiculous! If you think that looks plays crucial role in one’s career, you are absolutely wrong!!! Looks are nothing but “how you carry yourself and how much confident you are”.

As far as facing an interview is concerned, there are lotsa write-ups available online that can guide you. Recently, I read this great article on [url=http://www.resumeapple.com/articles/index.php?id=240042]"The Interview: Presenting Yourself”[/url] on one site, resumeapple.com. And if you are looking for accounting-related jobs then you can refer to [url=www.accountingcrossing.com]accountingcrossing.com[/url], a jobsite deals in only accounting jobs. You can check out these sites for your kind of jobs and tips on facing interviews.

And don’t worry. Good things always happen to good people. Always BE POSITIVE!
CHEERS!

###

karaikudy's picture

Horstman's 7th Law. "How you feel is your fault".

I think you need to come out of that and put the best foot forward.

I suggest read the book "Power of positive thinking", it still holds good. I have recommended that book to some of my close friends. It did make a significant change. Of course, it needs Willpower to and desire to look for that change.

Karthik.

Sahil1868's picture

[quote="juliahdoyle"]Your best bet, from someone who's been there and had close friends there, is to either look in the mirror, make friends, and get over it; find a way to make a change until you can; or fake it.

I promise you that how you feel about you makes a much larger impact than anything else - I'm not going to pay much attention to how you look, but I will pay attention to how you act. Show me what's important to you and THAT is where my eyes will be. As an employer, I don't care what you look like, can you do my job? Can you do it well? Are you enthusiastic about it? Are you ready and willing to learn new skills?

I could give a lot of examples, but at the core is what's above.[/quote]

Thanks Julia for encouraging words. I think I need to improve my self confidence.

Sahil1868's picture

[quote="lindseym1979"]Ohmigosh! This is ridiculous! If you think that looks plays crucial role in one’s career, you are absolutely wrong!!! Looks are nothing but “how you carry yourself and how much confident you are”.

As far as facing an interview is concerned, there are lotsa write-ups available online that can guide you. Recently, I read this great article on “The Interview: Presenting Yourself” on one site, resumeapple.com. And if you are looking for accounting-related jobs then you can refer to accountingcrossing.com, a jobsite deals in only accounting jobs. You can check out these sites for your kind of jobs and tips on facing interviews.

And don’t worry. Good things always happen to good people. Always BE POSITIVE!
CHEERS!

###[/quote]

Thanks Lindsey for that great links! [url=www.resumeapple.com]Resumeapple.com[/url] has some real good stuff that can motivate any dumb like me!

[url=www.accountingcrossing.com]Accounting Crossing[/url] has some very good openings in the accounting and finance related fields. I think it will help me find a job in my city.

Thanks a lot for great support!

skwanch's picture

[quote]Thanks Julia for encouraging words. I think I need to improve my self confidence.[/quote]

You didn't give specifics, but I can give you something that's done wonders for me . . . triathlon.

I found that the training for triathlon had several effects, which reinforced each other.

- One gets very, very fit (obviously) - Fitness tends to translate to a 'healthy glow', regardless of however 'beautiful' or 'ugly' one thinks of one's self - a fit body tends to be attractive to most. There's also a below-conscious-mind confidence that flows from physical strength.

- I found ENORMOUS psychological benefits from the training; by spending so much time and effort investing in yourself, you're sending yourself powerful messages about self-worth. You're literally showing yourself, through action, that you're worth investing time/sweat/effort in. That may sound trite, but it has powerful effects.

- Each time you reach a new goal, break a PR (personal record), etc, you get a flush of accomplishment, and the pride that goes with it.

All of these factors tend to reinforce and support each other, so that one gets a virtuous cycle going.

Now, triathlon is my passion, but any physical activity can work here - running, swimming, cycling, weightlifting, rowing, etc. I personally tend towards endurance sports, and I do think that there are greater benefits here than in team sports (ie, many team sports don't require a great deal of fitness at the hobbyist level). But I'm certain team sports have social benefits that don't accrue to solo athletes.

I've also come to believe passionately in the old Greek (Roman?) proverb; 'Mens, Corpore, Sana', ie. 'Mind, Body, Spirit'. I believe that in order to be happy and fulfilled, a human being MUST be making progress in each of these areas. We must strengthen our minds through learning, we must strengthen our souls/spirits through nurturing our spirituality, and we must strengthen our bodies with physical training. Think of it as a 3 legged stool - neglect any one area (ie. let one of the legs wither) and one loses balance and falls.

juliahhavener's picture

Ron,

I loved your post. With frustration level mounting in areas beyond my control (it's a wait and see situation, to be sure), I came home one day last week - for the first time in at least 15 years - and wanted to run. I went out to walk hoping to avoid running (a couple years of physical therapy for my knees makes me leery of out-right running)...and it just was not enough.

So I'll add the following to your post because I think your feelings on the subject are simply beautiful and well said: It just feels GOOD to let your thoughts go to the movement of your body. It can give you an unconscious outlet for your thoughts and emotions that can't be gotten any other place.

I don't think I'm cut out to be a triathelete - my brother competed in some of the best known of them in his time - but I absolutely find that the core messages are true: Activity - [b]for me[/b] - that addresses mind, body, and spirit.

Forgive the rambling sentence structure. I'm getting sick and not all here upstairs.

wendii's picture

[quote]I came home one day last week - for the first time in at least 15 years - and wanted to run.[/quote]

[quote]I'm getting sick[/quote]

Well, Julia, I think THAT speaks for itself!

Wendii :-)

juliahhavener's picture

LOL, Wendii!

I would blame the full day of golf on Sunday before the 15 minutes of running last week. :twisted:

Mark's picture

It's never - NEVER - how you look.

It's how you FEEL about how you look.

Please take some time to think through - and talk with someone else, perhaps a professional - how you look and how you feel about it, and how to be more positive about all of this.

The world awaits using your skills to our benefit.

Mark