Today I feel like I have failed my team. I took over this team 18 months ago - new to the company. The teams previous manager was demoted prior to my starting and then fired 6 months in. He was not a good manager and would often pit the team against each other, throw people under the bus...basically when I walked in I found 5 people who truly didn’t trust or communicate.
First thing I did was DISC for the team and that did help, I instituted a regular team meeting, 1:1s, team building activities, I encouraged them to get to know each other. While I realize I couldn’t heal all old wounds I thought I was making progress.
Tuesday morning a meltdown occurred.....Monday evening “Susie” finds an issue that impacts her project but also “Karen’s” project. So I look at it with Susie it’s apparent a change should be made. So I put a meeting on the calendar for the next morning so we are all on the same page. Tuesday I come in and my boss, “Cindy” and Karen are talking and inform me the issue from the previous night was a non issue. I am confused cause I saw something else and call over Susie. Karen starts explaining she talked to this person and that person and we don’t need to apply it. Susie asks why she wasn’t included and this is when it melted down. Karen and Cindy missed a key point Susie found and Susie was upset she wasn’t included in the mornings conversations. Karen likes to work on her own and doesn’t see why she should include Susie. It ended in hurt feelings.
I had separate conversations with both. They both talked to each other privately. One walked away from their convo feeling good the other leftnever wanting to talk to their peer. And I was told during my conversations one would like to be managed separately from the team. That they are better and so my feedback during meetings is demeaning.
I don’t know how to move on from this. I don’t know how to ask my team to work together when they don’t want to and I don’t ever want to be demeaning. I just feel like despite best efforts I failed. I failed them and I am the cause of the meltdown. How do I move forward with my team?