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BLUF: Looking for guidance on developing internal/external relationships whilst the relationships are consistently eroded by Manager's inputs/directives.

I'm a relationships guy - I prefer to maintain/enhance relationships even if it's at a small cost. I'm not given much opportunity in my workplace to have facetime with internal and external vendors, so I do the best I can: telephone conversations preceding emails, telephone requests, and the like; email as a last resort (and when legally necessary)

Unfortunately, I've been hindered by by manager interrupting calls and sometimes making her own calls with behaviours like elevated voices, if..then ultimatums, and the like. Since these conversations are many times directed to be initiated by me, I get the gut-wrenching feeling that I'm considered as 'dropping the dime' on our internal/external vendors (what better way to 'enhance' a relationship, eh?)

On other occasion, I've been directed not to communicate with customers/vendors via phone - only via email with all copied (and vetted prior).

My strategy thus far has been to put extra effort into the relationships - this year I've taken to thank you cards  as much as possible, and even more phone conversations to somewhat distance myself from the antagonistic type of relationship culture.

Any suggestions I can get from you folks would be highly regarded and much appreciated.