Has anyone in this forum had experience with people hanging up on them during a keep-in-touch call? If so, have you learned a good way to respond?

I called a colleague who gave me their number after they were let go without any real notice. (Their company lost a contract with my company and neglected to inform their people in a timely way.) We worked in the same office, spoke regularly about our children and parenting. I think we had a good relationship, but could be wrong. A few months have passed since we last talked; perhaps I took up MT's neworking advice too late to maintain that relationship.

I want to respect this person's wishes, but do not know how to interpret what they are. They hung up right after I asked them how they were. Does this usually mean someone does not want to talk right now, or does this usually mean they do not want to talk again ever? I don't have a good read on they message they are sending.

tlhausmann's picture
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Hmmm. It's hard to say unless there were additional words/behaviors indicating "do not call me."  The timing may have been inconvenient.

An email or card sent periodically can also restart professional contacts/relationships.


yeanick's picture
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If you're still employed for the same company that let them go, it's possible they see you as an extention of the entity that rejected them.  And until they are at a place in their lives that they can understand why they were let go or at least are able to seperate the negative experience from their friends and colleagues at said company it's unlikely they would want anything to do with other memebers of the orginization.

I had a former co-worker be let go and it took about 6 months to a year before we went out to lunch again and were on good terms, and I sat next to this person and we would go hang out outside of work before they were terminated.  So, even very good relationships can be turned upside-down by such a negative experience.


Breanna_Ileen's picture

It's really hard to bring back that same relationship again after a negative experience between both your companies. But as time goes, wounds will heal. An email or card sent like what tihausmann said should be your best bet to shorten that time for healing. :)

ZITTER's picture

Pretty hard to tell, but if the person doesnt want to be contacted ever again, then he or she will tell you directly not to call him or her. 

Donnino's picture

Maybe your companies have created confusion between you, I think it is better not to pursue this issue for a while. This action should not change your behavior towards it. Time solves everything.