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Submitted by sebags on
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Hey everyone.

I work at my family's business, founded by my frandfather (83 years old) 45 years ago. He still runs the business and my Dad works here as the sales VP.  I came in last year after studying an MBA and my grandfather named me CEO a couple of months ago, (he doesn't think my Dad can run it as he told me). I'll tell you I was really surprised by his choice given that I recognize that I need more experience to run a 300-people business (I'm 33) but I guess you're never ready and you just have to make it work. Fortunately I have worked in other great organizations in the past so I know what great teams look like, and have had great bosses.

I've learned so much from MT, and I have used the trinity for a year with great results with my directs, but now that I'll be managing my Dad I'm worried that he won't respect me as his boss. Even though he told me he agreed with my grandfather's decision and that he didn't want to run the organization (he did it once and did not enjoy it), I'm not really sure how he feels about it. He has a lot on his plate and, in my opinion he is not managing well his team and other people who works in other areas of the company, treating them harshly and sometimes being disrispectfull. Sidenote: I have been very surprised (and disapointed) as I never thought of my Dad being like that (he certainly did not educate me that way!). 

Any suggestions on how to manage my Dad in this situation is very welcome! I already read a post on managing older people which was great, but any extra help will be greatly appreciated!

 

Thanks

Sebastian 

SuzanneB's picture

This could be a tricky situation. I'd probably try two different things.

1. if you think your dad will be mostly open to just being "one of the guys" as your employee...
Jump into the trinity as you would with any other employee. O3s, then positive feedback, then negative feedback, then coaching.

2. if he gives you resistance OR you don't think he'll buy in right away...
There's an exercise in the training world called "Isn't It Great/Ain't It Awful" which can be used to get class members to get all their complaining out on the table and then move on to more productive learning. You could do a variation on this with all your directs. It would work like this:
ask them each to make a list of "Ain't It Awful" reasons you are now in charge. They then will make a list of "Isn't it great" reasons. You do the bad stuff first, and then the positive. It might help him (and everyone else) see that you as CEO has the potential to be really positive for the business and for their careers.

Adam M.'s picture

Sebastian,

I hate to be pedantic, but I can't help but notice the way you framed this question -- "Managing my dad at his company." As I understand it, your grandfather owns the company and you are (as CEO) running it. What makes it your dad's company? I may be reading too much into things, but if you do see yourself as impinging on your dad's "turf", it will be very difficult for you to be as assertive as you need to be as his manager. Turning the question around to "Managing my dad while he works at my company" won't solve the question completly, of course, but it may very well be the shift in mindset you need to get things moving.

Adam

Adam M.'s picture

Sebastian,

I hate to be pedantic, but I can't help but notice the way you framed this question -- "Managing my dad at his company." As I understand it, your grandfather owns the company and you are (as CEO) running it. What makes it your dad's company? I may be reading too much into things, but if you do see yourself as impinging on your dad's "turf", it will be very difficult for you to be as assertive as you need to be as his manager. Turning the question around to "Managing my dad while he works at my company" won't solve the question completly, of course, but it may very well be the shift in mindset you need to get things moving.

Adam

jrb3's picture
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+1 on Adam's content:  how can it be your father's company, when your grandfather owns it, and you are CEO with your father reporting to you?

Coaching your father might be uncomfortable at first, and it's necessary as part of your duties to the company and your father.

Another factor which could be causing discomfort (or worse) here:  succession.  If it's not crystal clear what the succession paths are, you as CEO need to ensure that clarity.  Will your father inherit it from his father?  Will your father buy your grandfather out?  Will YOU or a non-family-member buy your grandfather out?  Your grandfather probably has settled the matter;  check with him and his advisors on that, and help resolve any loose ends.  Unaddressed expectations on this can certainly tangle efforts to keep current activity running smoothly.

Joseph

sebags's picture
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Thanks Suzanne. Loved the "Isn't It Great/Ain't It Awful" exercise. I'll try it in the next couple of weeks and see what comes up.

Adam and Joseph, Thanks for the clarification question. My Dad own 67% of the company, my Grandfather own 2%, I own nothing. Hence the "My Dad's company" phrase.

Sebastian