Submitted by terrih on
I do know someone who has spoken to a coworker directly rather than going through the manager... my mom is allergic to a number of perfumes and at least twice she's asked someone in the next cube to tone down the cologne.
Of course this conversation is easier than some personal scent conversations, but she still had a lot of angst about it. What usually seemed to work was something along the lines of, "I notice you like Giorgio, I like it too but unfortunately I'm allergic to it. Would you mind wearing less of it to work?" A person would have to be awfully touchy to take offense to that. :)
I'd have to agree with that!
The secret to that exchange is that the conversation was about *your mom* (HER allergies) and not about the co-worker having wronged your mom. "Hey, I'm allergic, would you mind doing me a favor? ..."
All too often the conversation is about the co-worker doing something *wrong*. The results are, sadly, predictable ...
I mentioned on the podcast intro about having gotten this wrong before ... the distinction above was my chief failing. :-(
I really liked this cast. I think it is a good template for not just the personal scent issue, but for any sensitive issue.
I was also wondering.. if you are doing your O3's, weekly staff meetings and regular interactions with your directs, is there not a large probability that you have been exposed to the scent already (assuming this is the real issue?). I guess I am just thinking that it really should not be a huge surprise.
I think Mark is probably dying to make his comment about how all of this MT stuff magically works together. :lol:
I agree totally. The "minor correction" that the feedback model would have already applied, as well as the enhanced relationship from the O3s would definitely reduce the frequency, and more importantly the severity, of issues like this.
If the issue does arise, it probably means that something drastic has happened. In that instance, it's easier to check in with the direct as to what has changed.
Man, as I was writing this it just kept getting better.
Thanks Mark & Mike!
This brings up a great point, and I have seen it several times.
If someone suggests there is a problem and:
- You haven't noticed,
- You believe you have enough impressions to draw a fair conclusion
you needn't do anything, and as I think we suggested, you owe NO response to the complainer.