My new boss is coming to our site in a couple of months - should I invite her to have diner with my family?

I appreciate you help in this question. I usually tend to invite people to our place, but my boss (who seems very easy going) has not invited me when she had the opportunity. I am living in Europe, she is based at the headquarters in the US.





donm's picture

There is nothing wrong with inviting your boss over to dinner. If I were to have an out-of-town visitor, I would probably ask him to dinner at a nice restaurant, but I've had many out-of-town visitors over to my place, as well. There is no "right" answer to your inquiry. Likewise, there is no "wrong" answer. You could ask her which she would prefer, such as, "Do you have any dinner plans? I usually invite folks over to share with my family, but there is also this nice restaurant that serves (this type of food) that some people prefer. We would enjoy your company at either our house or at the local place, if you're so inclined."

pucciot's picture

I would consider it a wonderful gesture.
It is a great way to make the Boss feel welcome at the location and build a relationship with him.

To help you make this decision you may also need to consider other factors.

Some of these may seem to be common sense, but please bear with me.

How does your family feel about this ?
Are they used to having outside the family dinner guests ?
Are you sure your children will behave in a way that you wouldn't mind your Boss seeing ?

Are you suggesting a weeknight dinner, or some afternoon or evening on the weekend ? This would affect the amount of time your family has to prepare your home and the dinner food.

I'm not trying to discourage you. I would like you to consider this, as the first time the Boss comes to visit, as a little more formal than might normally.

You are letting the Boss see "under the hood".
He will see photos on the wall and meet your family in their natural environment.
You do want to make a good impression.

This might be a good PodCast for MT to tackle -- "How to entertain business associates at your home"

In short, It is a nice idea if you and your family are ready for it.

G3's picture

You might want to consider inviting the Boss to a meal at a restaurant. 


lindagc's picture

I think you have answered the question yourself when you say your boss hasn't invited you to her home when she had the opportunity. Easy going she may be but there is a difference between being easy going and overly familiar, and if she hasn't invited you into her home then I suspect she may wish to keep work and home separate.

Invite her to a nice restaurant and keep the relationship on a friendly but professional level.

SuzanneB's picture

I agree with pucciot. Invite her. But offer an out. She may not have invited you to her home because she's embarrassed about her home or not a good cook or any other reason. But that doesn't mean she wouldn't like to be invited to yours.

mrreliable's picture

I agree with the opinion to go to a restaurant instead. Many years ago, sixties and seventies, having a boss over for dinner was a common practice. Not so common in this day and age. Personally, I'd feel uncomfortable going to dinner at an employee's home. That just seems a little too familiar and cozy. It might be fine, but there are things that could go wrong.

I believe a restaurant would be a more professional setting.

Sulmi's picture

Thank you for your comments.

I chose the restaurant, as I noticed that I did not have enough information to make the more riskier choice.,

ProcReg's picture

There's not a bad choice in this. Though, if the boss has a food allergy, the restaurant is going to be able to accommodate the request better than your home.

The point, though, is to build a relationship; this idea is great. I hope it works out!

tokyotony's picture

If you feel "close" enough to your boss and the boss is a more informal (i.e. as opposed to a boss who likes to keep things by the book and a bit at arms length), then I think this can be fine, especially if he/she is a high I or S.