Licensee BadgeTraining Badge
Submitted by stenya on


Never thought I'd be in this situation, and could use some quick perspective about how to handle "the day after." As background, my husband and I work(ed) for the same organization; I'm a manager, and he was on a long-troubled project for a different director's team.

Following an unfortunate series of events, he resigned this morning and left after an amicable discussion with his own manager and HR. I completely support his decision to leave; as a manager in the company, however, I can't really have any official public opinion except for "he decided it would be best to pursue other opportunities."

I am on a project with his now-former director, and I imagine that her view of this situation is very different than mine... and she may somehow hold this against me. I have not spoken with her, or my own director or VP about his departure, though I feel like I should - I just wonder whether it'd be better to move forward without comment if they never bring it up. 

Your perspective would be appreciated. Thanks.

timrutter's picture

Have that talk with the manager, director and VP. Let them know your commitment is at the same high level today as it was last week. There is a fair chance they may be assuming otherwise and if you initiate it, you only build you professional reputation by tackling a potentially difficult situation.

Your answer to the inevitable questions shows great professional maturity. It's a very effective and professional approach.


jhack's picture

Don't defend your spouse or his decision.  Don't discuss any particulars.  You are inherently biased here, and nothing you say will be taken the way you want it to be taken.  

Consider saying nothing. 

As Tim suggests, you might simply acknowledge the situation, and reiterate your commitment.  Don't assume they hold it against you.  That becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.  They may in fact be relieved that they can "restart" the project. 

Then quickly move on. 

John Hack

stenya's picture
Licensee BadgeTraining Badge

Thank you both. You're right - I have no intention of trying to tell his side of the story, and I'd like it to be clear that from MY perspective, nothing has changed in my relationship with the organization. Hopefully, least said, soonest mended.