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 Hello friends.

I was good at my work,

From the childhood i only studied,

I was a shy guy,

And didn't went too much in relatives,

And friends,

But now i am promoted,

All of my life is misrable by lack of people skills,

And it's very difficult for me to manage people,

I read a lot of books but when it comes to field and management i fails,

It's all looks fake and even i cannot manage to do a lot of bookish work.

What should i do?

Due to lack of people skills,

I am unable to manage peoples at home,

Friend.

 

Also i have a lot of unknown fact?

Are peoples good or bad?

Do people plot behind you?

How to and how much to trust peoples?

 

Great thanks,

A lot of prayers for your success for you kind guidance

 

rwwh's picture

You came to the right place, but it is too wide a question for the forum. Listen to the podcasts, starting with the trinity. They are very actionable and are your first guidance.

 

Gk26's picture

I believe the first step is to smile. I was very shy growing up and like you, studied a lot. I smile all the time now and it makes the world so much easier. Smiling sets people at ease and lets them know you accept them.

I practice smiling everywhere I go. I make eye contact, then smile.

Good luck

dotwrnr's picture

 Specifically, go to the section Podcasts, then from the dropdown choose Manager Tools "Basics". Then branch out from there. If you are more of a visual learner than auditory learner, it might be worth the paid subscription to have the accompanying shownotes so you can read along with the podcast or reinforce your understanding of what you heard on the podcast.

sros's picture

"You can act like a man!"

Mark's picture

 Dan-

A little more courtesy and understanding,  and a little less misogyny, please. 

Mark

BariTony's picture

I won't repeat the excellent advice already mentioned about starting with the basics.

I'd just like to add the following: Per Mark's advice on a recent podcast, assume positive intent: http://manager-tools.com/2014/02/assume-positive-intent

Another resource you might want to check out that Mark suggested a while ago is Toastmasters International:

http://www.manager-tools.com/2011/06/coaching-presentation-skills-with-t...

I was always pretty reclusive myself, but I made the decision to start going to meetings, become a member, and volunteer for every available role in my club, whether it was as a speaker, a meeting role, club officer, etc. It's a safe environment to force yourself to move outside of your comfort zone. And I've seen some people who were terrified of public speaking get good FAST! (One of our members couldn't give a 1-minute speech a few months ago - she just got up there and cried the whole time. We paired her with a mentor and after giving her second prepared speech, she was voted best speaker of the night!)

 

 

 

teaguek122's picture

 I am focused on the "shy guy" and lack of people skills mentioned in the post.

As an offbeat suggestion, go out and try some things that you have never done before.
In this case, go out and take an acting class, get up in front of a small crowd at an impromptu 
stand-up comedy show, or more professionally, go to Toastmasters(as suggested above).
Find out that communication can be like learning to act when you are really bad at it. 

Also, if you are more athletic, team sports could be an option too.

 

Good luck with management dude!

 

 

mclaire4leaders's picture

I think the first step you should make is to change the way you see yourself. Do not dwell on negative thoughts, more so you should stop telling yourself all these negative  thoughts you have written. Your thinking affects your actions, and the way people look at you. Think of yourself as a capable leader, and support  this positive thought with actions and I think people will react positively as well. It is good that you recognize your weakness, but you have to do something about it. Goodluck and I know you will become a great leader, it is the desire that is important, and your actions will follow through this manifestation. 

"You are never too old to set another goal, or dream a new dream" -C.S. Lewis

Claire Farnell

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