Submitted by terrih on
My health is a bit dodgy. I thought I was just worn out from my husband's surgery last fall and taking care of him since he came home. (the good news there is that he's improving and can do more and more for himself and around the house)
But I spent 3 days in the hospital last week unexpectedly, while the docs did a series of tests. The upshot is that I have cardiomyopathy... the least worrisome form, fortunately, and the cardiologist thinks I can heal from it completely.
I guess I'm a little worried because I don't have any spare energy to devote to career management right now. I can only hope that my company does OK and I can keep up with my duties, until I heal up.
I know how frustrating it is to have a direct who's sick all the time, I hope my boss doesn't start feeling that way about me! It's OK as long as I don't milk it, right?
I don't mean to whine (or whinge, for those of you who speak a different English than I do). I suppose this is probably the bottom... recovering from the angiogram, adjusting to new meds, back to work but nodding off at the computer.
In the back of my mind I think about my career management document which I have yet to revise to MT format... for a while there I slacked off on listening to MT, I couldn't deal with more actionables to add to my plate.
Seriously... what happens to managers who are semi-ill?
Take a break from the high
Take a break from the high level of Career Management for couple weeks at least. Nothing in your career is worth not recovering from your illness episode. Sounds like you're carrying the family provider load as well so back down a couple levels til you're mentally stabilized. When I am out of energy, and pushing on all cylinders, I tend to make hasty decisions more often than normal and pay for it.
Hope you get your mojo back soon!
yes take a break, use your credits
Terri, use the credits you have build up with people now. They will understand that you may not be at your best or distracted, but since you have invested in building relationships with them they will cut you some slack now. Given that you admit you don't have the energy for everything these days you have to make sure you are putting in the effort where you really need to.
Most of all take care of yourself and your family at this time.
First priority has to be
First priority has to be look after yourself, look after your health.
At work, be as up front as you can with your boss. Explain the situation and what you're doing about it. yes you''re semi-ill but you're getting treatment and you will get better. Talk to your boss about what dispensations you might need to help you get over this illness. Maybe some time off work or a temporary reduction in hours or duties to aid recovery. Would it be practical to work from home sometimes and save yourself the commute?
Is there anything you could delegate to your directs? Take some of the strain off you whilst developing them and giving you more time to deal with other things. Might there be an opportunity to take on a temp assistant who can take on your administrative deliverables whilst you're recovering.
Outside of work, is there anyone who can help out around the house? Maybe through some community organisation,your network or your church (or equivalent) if you attend one. Even if it's just someone who can deal with the yard work or prepare dinner a couple of nights a week that's a break for you (and your husband). When you're better you can pay it forward.
Experience is how you avoid failure, failure is what gives you experience.
Charity Begins at Home
Take a break. Level set with your boss on the condition you're experiencing and request the time off. My spouse has been there and done that. They put some pressure on her to shorten the time away, but it was really an issue of, "Do you want me rested, healthy, productive and at the top of my game? Or do you want sub-par performance from me which will only deepen the departments struggles with work load?" (Which is actually a symptom of her boss' inability to prioritize and time manage.)
Hope that helps. I understand the hesitation you sense. Go through with it. Pay yourself back. Not sure who said this first but, "Charity begins at home." (Mark will probably know ;-)
A nurse's perspective
< I spent 3 days in the hospital last week unexpectedly, while the docs did a series of tests. The upshot is that I have cardiomyopathy... the least worrisome form, fortunately, and the cardiologist thinks I can heal from it completely.>
Last WEEK Terri??? You found out last week that your heart is sick. That is not a common cold. Not only are you dealing with the diagnosis, you are dealing with your body's betrayal of its duties to you. At this point I would presume that you are grieving the loss of your health, especially since you have had to be the "strong" partner as your husband healed. You sound "low" emotionally right now. I am sorry for your pain.
I don't know what will happen to your position as a result of this. We all have an illusion of control, but in times like these the veil is lifted and we see that life takes it's turn in the way that it will. If you have jerks for bosses (I've had some), then they will be jerks in this circumstance too. if they are decent human beings they will do what they can to lighten the load and encourage you to regain your health and then get back to making whatever it is you make.
I think that you have excellent and practical advice in the posts above. I would just add ... do not skip your doctor's visits and seek out cardiac rehab whenever it is appropriate to do so. The heart is a muscle that responds well to rehab. Your cardiologist told you that a full recovery is possible so your work right now is to manage your health! You will be stronger again!
I will just not worry about it for now. Do the best I can at work. My brain isn't working all that well even yet, so I'm concentrating on some of my more mundane tasks.
The cardiologist actually cleared me to go back to work Monday with no restrictions. So I don't HAVE to take time off. I am taking a few days off to see family next week, which was already planned before all this.
I guess what worries me is people have already been cutting me slack for the past half-year because of my husband... and now this. But Janet is right, the jerks will be jerks and the decent human beings will be decent.
A friend from church is coming over tonight to do some housework for me! That'll be good. Ugh, it won't be long before the lawn will need mowing too...
I guess there will be some cardiac rehab, I don't know! All I know is the cardiology clinic is setting me up for several appointments, so I'll find out soon enough.
I probably have been too much trying to be Superwoman, with my husband having been disabled for several years now. I resist the notion of being too old for anything! <g>
Prayers and Thoughts
Thank you for sharing your situation. Most importantly, we will keep you in our prayers.
Your yard really doesn't need to be mowed. Become a redneck for a couple of months. Those neighbors who complain or look askance might well swallow their tongues were they to know you were risking your life so they could have neighbors with kept yards.
And I PROMISE YOU, there is a BUNCH of stuff at work that you are presently doing that you do NOT need to be doing either.
Rule #1: Go home at 5. EVERY DAY. Drop what you're doing, and go home. The work will still be there tomorrow. You're no good (nor are the rest of us) at 6 pm anyway. That 5 pm deadline will drive more effective choices throughout the day. You will focus more accurately.
Rule #2: This is a time to start thinking, "of all the stuff I'm doing, which of it is the stuff I'm most willing to get in trouble for not doing, or doing poorly?" YOU CANNOT DO EVERYTHING. This is a fundamental mistake of all managers I know. And now you have a reason to not do stuff. Rank order your priorities, and don't do the bottom third. But do the top third really well...and you'll discover nobody cares about the bottom third.
Rule #3: Delegate. I know, you "can't". We disagree. ;-)
Rule #4: Learn about sleep and make sure you're doing it right.
Am feeling better. In fact, my doc read the hospital reports and sees inconsistencies, so she is sending me for a whole slew of tests to see if it might be something else altogether and erase the label "cardiomyopathy" from my permanent record if that isn't really what it is.
I'm updating my FMLA paperwork because of the slew of tests... might have a hard time getting my 40 hours in, until I'm done with those.
Oh, and I hired the lawn done... it's a small yard, it only cost $15. A guy who was laid off from the local Chrysler plant. Feels good to make a small contribution to people getting through these economic times as best they can.
Thanks for the update
Great solution on the lawn!
...and good luck.
Glad to have an update
I'm so happy that life is looking better! Spring is here, that has to help. Take care.